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William Topaz McGonagall

from A Reckless History Of Scottish Poetry by Tommy Mackay

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William Topaz McGonagall (March 1825 – 29 September 1902) Ode to ‘the worst poet in the history of the English language’. Tune: 'The Guitar' by They Might Be Giants

lyrics

Hey! William Topaz
Hey! McGonagall

William Topaz McGonagall - the toast of old Dundee
Shunned by the establishment
But he means the world to me

Beautiful city of Edinburgh, most wonderful to be seen,
With your ancient palace of Holyrood and Queen's Park Green,
And your big, magnificent, elegant New College,
Where people from all nations can be taught knowledge.

Then away to the west -- to the beautiful west!
To the fair city of Glasgow that I like the best,
Where the River Clyde rolls on to the sea,
And the lark and the blackbird whistle with glee.

On yonder hill there stood a coo
It must've moved cos it's no there noo

The village of Broughty Ferry is most beautiful to see,
With its stately mansions and productive fishery,
Which is a great boon to the villagers and the people of Dundee,
And ought to make them thankful, and unto God to pray
For creating plenty of fish for them in the beautiful Tay.

credits

from A Reckless History Of Scottish Poetry, released September 23, 2022

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Tommy Mackay Edinburgh, UK

Scottish comedy performer and editor of The Daily Reckless - the paper that sings the news.

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