Telemachus. A reworking of 'Pop Culture Bore' by Tommy Mackay
lyrics
I used to be unwreckable
My knowledge was impeccable
My thesis on ‘Ulysses’ was profound
But now it’s all flown out the portholes in my brain
I'm half insane
I'm more 50 Cent now than Ezra Pound
chorus
I used to know James Joyce by heart
And quote everything under the sun
Now I struggle to remember stately, plump
Buck Mulligan
I was literary critical,
My poets metaphysical
I used to know my Mozart from my Brahms
But now I read The Metro
And the bloody internet goes on and on
I'm slower than Edinburgh trams
chorus
Who remembers
Stephen Dedalus
I'm trying my best
Sandycove Martello tower
The ritual of breakfast
Buck slags off Stephen's dead mother
Stephen calls him the usurper
Oh, it's all coming back now
Including English student Haines
Buck calls him a panther
The brawn and the brains
And the milkmaid
And the tussle for the key and Buck asks for a loan
They all walk to the shore but Stephen isn't coming home
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